Letting the Pain Out

I broke down today. I broke down to a mug of Twining's Mint Green Tea and to my mum. I broke down about my demise in my Physiology exams.

Two weeks. I withheld the pain for two weeks. I didn't cry, I had to stop the tears from falling down my face. But today, they just fell. Just like the rush of a waterfall pulled by gravity. 

I am on my emotional peak today. The surge of hormones raging in my blood.

Today, I realized that these experiences can pretty much shake the faith you have on God. For two weeks I lived in a shadowed world, full of unhappiness and bad thoughts. 

I'd like to take a sabbatical for a while though. Just to clear off my mind and find God again. Because I just can't seem to formulate a reason as to why I needed to feel this grave experience. I really don't. I have been good, plain. Just me. I followed every order my parents told me to do. I fervently go to church. I don't skip classes.

I know I may seem uptight, but that's me. That's how I enjoy my life. But it felt good to have poured my emotions out.